I Think Cookie Monster Should Play Cory Booker On Saturday Night Live

A Poem

As far as Cookie Monster goes, at this I have arrived:

That Muppet should play Cory Booker on Saturday Night Live.

It’s perfect. Think about it, now; who doesn’t have some love

For Cookie Monster and the appetite and puns thereof.

That’s not to say I think that he should host it, nosirree,

But, a la Alec Baldwin, he could cameo reg’larly.

It couldn’t be Joe Biden; he could win, and that’d be weird,

Or Klobuchar ‘cause for the gender bend they’d all be smeared;

But Booker? Who would mind? Who’s really on the edge of seats

To see who’s cast as Cory effin’ Booker every week?

Among, what, twenty candidates? The thing’s become a farce.

A mock debate with all those actors will be tough to parse.

Why not throw in a Muppet? What is holding this thing back?

If Cookie just slings cookie puns, the world will have his back.

No need for an impression, even; let the Monster be.

I bet the stunt would help out Cory’s polls substantially.

Now. Cory Booker isn’t gonna win, I think that’s known;

When he drops out (or gets the VP nod), pick up the phone

And call him to the studio to shake the monster’s hand,

Reminding all that public children’s television’s grand

And ending the cold open so the kids can go to bed

And leave their parents to the serious work that lies ahead:

To try to watch the rest of SNL and not doze off

And let the TV do the work for which it’s called so oft:

To throw the world a cookie while the hands that guide our fate

Are up a monstrous puppet’s ass and saying life is great.

I really do think this is a great idea for Lorne Michaels, so go ahead and tweet this out and forward the email until it gets on Lorne’s radar. I lived in Newark for a bit while Sharpe James was mayor, and Booker was a lot different from Sharpe James. Better, I think. One time I served tea to Sharpe James and I can’t for the life of me remember what kind of tea he selected, but it wasn’t straight-ahead Lipton-style tea.

You can reply to this email; I get all the replies.

Thanks for reading.

This is Phil.