The Gilligan's Island Theme But In Iambic Pentameter
Pray list, the seaward wind in draughts cries, “Lo,
Attend the secret story clad with woe!
The sea itself, Poseidon’s passion made
Material, a threat to he who’d wade,
Made claim, some ages hence, to it a craft
Some three men’s heights in length from fore to aft
(A ship in name, but scarcily a raft.)
Alit, adrift, embarked from th’ tropic port,
Creating headway ‘nto Poseidon’s court;
What crime transgressed this Neptune, seething king?
What happenstance made him attack the thing?
One sin at sea, they say, is amplified:
The doom was purchased by the skipper’s pride.
A brave and surer man had not been born
Than this our skipper, leader of th’ forlorn.
Before the king of tides what use is it
To trumpet bravery dur’ng your visit?
His crew, a single mate, a mighty man,
Knew already this lesson ere ‘t began;
Not proud, no head acloud, he did his work
Without the arrogance of this skipper jerk.
Five passengers that day aboard the boat
Would bear the skipper’s noose among their throat;
Poseidon willed the storm to brash unmoor
And hang the braggart’s proud three-hour tour
(Such woe befell a mere three-hour tour!)
“The maelstrom loosed, the wrath of wind and bay
Made playthings of their boat that darkened day.
The ship abob, yet hardly, in the troughs
Was poor for touring, loud with cries and coughs.
The skipper, huge and doused, made he a stand;
Defeat’d the rudder, rigged with th’ other hand,
And ordered he his mate to likewise fight,
Don’t lose the deck, protect it with your might.
Against the gods these two’d unwise accost;
Had not they fought, The Minnow would be lost
(That doubtful yacht The Minnow would be lost.)
“The mist all settled, waves returned to bed,
An opportunity to lift his head
The skipper took, and looked he all around
To estimate where they had run aground.
Uncharted and unknown, this isle unmanned
Would be their barren home, a ruined land,
A last toehold on life for these expelled,
A seeming second chance (but clearly Hell.)
With Gilligan, the Skipper too
The millionaire and his wife
The movie star, Professor and Mary Ann
Here on Gilligan’s Isle!”
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Thanks for reading.
This is Phil
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